Captain & Colonel
Lord William FitzHerbert
Eldest son of General the Lord William Fitzherbert, Earl of Chutney-Ferrette in the county of North Buckinghamshire, and Lady Hysteria Fitzherbert (nee Ladygarten).
Eton and Balliol College Oxford. Sent down in final year of Classics BA for setting fire to a college servant.
i. Purchased commission in the First Regiment of Foote Guards, January 1743
ii. Present at the Battle of Dettingen, 27th June 1743. Received head wound from artillery shot. Silver plate inserted.
iii. Present at the Battle of Fontenoy, 11th May 1745. Received bayonet wound to left buttock during tactical withdrawal of Allied forces.
iv. Present at the Battle of Prestonpans, 21st September 1745. Received accidental wounding when falling upon own sword during rout by Jacobites.
v. Present at the Battle of Culloden, 16th April 1746. Duke of Cumberland’s ADC. Received accidental wounding in right testacle due to kick by horse.
vi. Present at the Battle of Rocoux, 11th October 1746. Hys Majesty’s Military Observer attached to the Austrian Army under the command of Count Charles of Lorraine. Rendered incapacitated through extreme flatus and flatulence through imbibing local claret and porter (infected water in brewing/vinting suspected).
vii. Present at the battle of Laffeldt near to Maastrict, 2nd July 1747. Transfixed by bayonet through right buttock when attempting to leap a rank of infantry as a wager.
viii. Accidental presence at the Battle of Col De L’Assiette, 19th July 1747. Whilst recuperating from wound received at Laffeldt. Attached to Austro-Piedmontese Army. Incapacitated due to rubbing stinging nettles on genitals as a wager and from spent shot rebounding from silver plate in head causing unconsciousness.
ix. ADC/Equerry to Hys majesty King George 11. Horse Guards Parade, Whitehall and St James’s Palace, October 1747 to the present.
Hell-Fire (life membership)
Ma Petite Ponie
The Elegantly Wasted of Pall Mall
. The saving and protection of fallen women and single young mothers
. Hon. Pres. “The Claret Importers’ Soc.”
. Cock-fighting, bear-baiting, huntin’, shootin’ and some fishin’ and Catholic-baiting
. The musickal works of Mr Geo. Handel esq.
. Hazard, dice, the cards & ‘coinage-in-cleavage’
. Visiting Patron to St. Bernadette’s of Perpetual Mysery Convent School (after hours)
When in town: Rake House, Soho Village, London
When in the country: Pumping Lodge, Longwang, Westmoreland
When on the continent: Chateau D’Onerism, Le Grand Pom-Pomme, Nr. Ponceville, Picardy, France.
Although not a member of the Sea Thieves Pirate Association, and historically out of period, he is a highly valued associate of the group at fun events such as Hartlepool.